Friday Crap Roundup XXVII

I must have slept on my side weird last night, as I’m now in almost incapacitating pain. I fear if a sneeze catches me off guard, I’ll spew my visceral contents all over the 1976 World Book Encyclopedia set immediately to my left.


Cleaning supplies on hand are woefully inadequate for such a scenario.

I suppose this means I’d better finish this week’s FCR before I turn the Command Center into even more of a biohazard than it already is.


I can’t wait to show this to Σ. It’ll blow her mind:


Click to enlarge for all the sordid details.
Image credit: History’s Dumpster

Yes, that’s right. A mere century ago cigarettes were marketed to asthma sufferers over six with a straight face. Σ is asthmatic and about as anti-smoking as an eight-year-old gets. Good thing for me I don’t smoke. Never have.

I Ran (To Fred Meyer)

Don’t you just hate it when you run out of household staples? You know, the stuff you rarely think about but would be utterly screwed without? This was a recurring theme here at the Command Center this week. In the past few days I ran out of:

– Shampoo
– Allergy medication
– Omeprazole (you know, the generic Prilosec stuff)
– Hope

And so with my allergies raging and my acid reflux in overdrive, yesterday I was forced to wash my hair with Suave Kids 2 in 1 Hair Smoothers Shampoo – Cowabunga Coconut, which I keep around here as that’s Σ’s shampoo of choice. That had the unfortunate effect of making me look like Mike Score of A Flock of Seagulls circa 1981.


And I freakin’ HATE coconut too.
Image credit: RETROCRUSH

I suppose it could have been worse. It could have made me look like Mike Score of A Flock of Seagulls circa 2013:


Male pattern baldness is a bitch.
Image source: Andrew Hurley

Contrary to what one might see in my bathtub, at 40 my hairline remains intact. I figured if I were going to go bald, I’d be well on my way by now.

Oh yeah, I have since replenished my stocks of the aforementioned staples. Well, except hope. Perhaps a big dose of ibuprofen and a couple weeks in bed will take care of that.

Track of the Week

OK, OK, so I’m a closet New Wave fan:

Note to self: blow Σ’s mind with this too.

It occurs to me Mike Score looks a hell of a lot like Djoser in this clip. What do you think?


Woah, trippy.

Leave a Reply